Patanisho: Mume wangu alitaka kujinyonga kanisani

Stephen alituma ujumbe akiomba apatanishwe na mama Faith ambaye ni mke wake na mama wa mtoto wao mmoja.

“Tulikosana tarehe 28 baada ya kusafiri nyumbani. Niliporudi nilipata amefunganya virago na kuondoka bila sababu na sina habari nilimkosea aje.

Alinituma nyumbani na akaniambia nimletee dawa ya kienyeji kwani alikuwa mja mzito na amepoteza mtoto bila kujua kuwa ni uwongo.” Alielezea Stephen.

Kwa nyumba alichukua kile alichoona ni chake na nikamwachia mungu kwani nampenda na mungu ametujalia mtoto mmoja.”

Huyo ni baba wa mtoto wangu, unajua mahali tulikosania ni kwamba kuna siku tulikosana na akachukua kamba akitaka kujinyonga kwa compound ya kanisa. Alieleza mama Faith.

Sasa kila mara tukikosana huwa akidai kuwa niokote nilichotaka kwa ile nyumba na niondoke, hapo siku moja nikaamka nikachukua nilichokinunua na kuondoka.

Tukasuluhisha yote na tukaombewa na tukasahau lakini kuna siku alitaka kuniua kwa kutumia chuma kwani kuna siku alimuumiza mtoto na akafura mguu. Huyu sio jamaa wa kuishi naye.

Aliongeza mkewe Stephen akidai kuwa kuna wakati alilala nje na hakuwa na mavazi na hata alikuwa anaomba hadi mavazi ya ndani.

Alijawa na huzuni akidai kuwa hataki kuzungumza na mumewe kwa hasira kwani amezungumza na watangazaji kwani anawapenda.

Pata uhondo kamili.

PATANISHO: Jamaa Alikuja Na Kisu Akitaka Kumuua Mama Yangu

Stephen aliomba apatanishwe na mkewe Mama Vickie akidai angependa ndoa yake iokolewe.

“Tulikosana na mke wangu toka mwezi wa pili na hadi wa leo imekuwa ngumu kurudiana.

Tunapozungumza sahii yuko kwa mamake. Napenda kuongea ukweli, shida ya ndoa yangu ilitokana na mimi na sio swala la mpango wa kando ni mambo tu ya shida ya nyumba. Nilienda kwao nikaleta vurugu kwa ile hasira na nikapatana na mamake mzazi na akapiga nduru aliponiona na kisu mkononi.

Tulikosana na mke wangu kwani nilikosa fedha na tukafungiwa nyumba na hapo tukagombana na mke wangu ambaye alielekea kwao na hapo ndio nikaleta vurugu.” Alieleza Stephen akidai kila anapojaribu kuzungumza na mkewe bado ana hasira.

Wawili wao wamekuwa kwa ndoa ya miaka sita na wamejuliwa na mtoto mmoja.

Alipopigiwa simu mama Vickie, “Mume wangu alianza tu madharau ndogo ndogo kwa nyumba akipata fedha kidogo anaenda kwa betting na hata hakuwa anawajibika.

Kitu ingine ni kuwa alinitoa kwetu kabla sijaingia shuleni na sasa akahisi vibaya aliposkia mamangu ananisomesha, na isitoshe kuna siku alinichapa.” Alieleza Mama Vickie huku akisisitiza kuwa hakuna vile atarudiana naye.

Pata uhondo kamili.

 

Kenyan Football Anagrams

FKF President Sam Nyamweya. | image source: the-star.co.ke

An anagram is a word or name which is created by rearranging the letters in another word or name and using each letter only once while at that. Anagrams are one of the most interesting types of word plays around and with that in mind, here is a list of anagrams of names of 10 people who are well-known in Kenyan football circles.

1. SAM NYAMWEYA = M! Yes Wanyama!

The FKF President is known for his hardline stand in most of the issues affecting Kenyan football and in as far as that trait of him is concerned, an anagram of him suggests that the only person he can listen to is anyone named Wanyama, in this case Southampton’s Victor Wanyama.

2. FIFA Ranking = FKF Inaringa

No matter how bad our national team performs, our federation never lacks a reason to boast.

3. BOBBY WILLIAMSOM = Wobbly Binomials

Oh! The irony! For all his achievements in East African football, his name suggests a person who does not inspire confidence.

4. HARAMBEE STARS = Embarrass Hater/Embarass Earth

Quite true. Our national team is always punching against the odds; they either have to punch above their weight and shut critics and haters up or submit to might of their opponents and embarrass their motherland while at it.

5. FRANCIS ONYISO = Scarify Onions

For all his years of his service to the national football team, Francis Onyiso will be forever remembered for making a public apology to his wife through a national newspaper, The STAR.

An anagram of his name perhaps suggested why he needed to be on good terms with his wife as quick as possible as the only thing he could cook well was onions and nothing else.

6. TECHNICAL DIRECTOR = Technocratic Idler

Ever since Patrick Naggi was photographed reading a newspaper as Kenya U23 shipped in goal after goal against their Ugandan counterparts in a 5-1 loss at the Nyayo National Stadium in 2011, Kenyans have always had the notion that the position of technical director in the hierarchy of Kenyan football management is just but a position to be filled by most bored and least bothered person around. We hope that Jacob Ghost Mulee will not get to read this.

7. MARIGA = Magari

Come to think of it, how many cars does he have again? If he were to get new number plates for his vehicles, we reckon that the first vehicle not belonging to him to be registered will a KDA number plate.

8. JERIM ONYANGO = Enjoy Roaming

Coming to think, AFC Leopard’s Martin Imbalambala once scored against him from a long way out when he was miles away from his goalline.

9. STEPHEN OCHOLLA = The Alcohol Pens

This could mean a lot of things. Either the Ulinzi Stars man has pens that use alcohol as ink or he is the owner a pub franchise.

10. OLUNGA = ANGULO

Seeing that his first name is Michael, we can confidently saying that Spaniard Miguel Angulo never retired.

11. KENYAN FOOTBALL = Only A Bleak Font

Weak structures? Uncertain future?

DISCLAIMER: The opinions and views expressed herein are those of the writer and not Radio Jambo or Radio Africa Group.

 

AUDIO: Woman admits to stalking his husband over ‘jealousy’

Photo source: madamenoire.com

Insecurities in relationships are more often caused by lack of trust, which leads to jealousy.

Ann, an Insecure wife confessed to constantly stalking her husband Stephen, in a bid to make sure he is not cheating on her with other women, something which led to his husband assaulting her.

“I stalked him because I love him.” Said Ann.

Listen to Ann’s confession below: